To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
