are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Text me some of your sweat
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
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