I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
