Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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