So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize