this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
