Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
