You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
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