just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
