nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize