I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize