Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
