So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
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