it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
