nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize
