Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
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