OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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