I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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