Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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