Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
