I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
