we were pretty classy up until the second keg
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
