I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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