I can tuck mytits in my pants
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
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