Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
North Korea, Best Korea!
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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