Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
