Where is the hickey?
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
So many bounce houses so little time
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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