So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
