My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
