I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
