Say something about gay babies.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize