So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
he just fucked me for my cheese.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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