The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
