Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Barsexuality is the new black.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
