Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize