Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
how does that bad decision feel?
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Randomize
