Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Randomize
