im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize