we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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