What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
