So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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