For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Randomize
