he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Randomize