We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize