omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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