the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
