It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
