I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Randomize
