I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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