what day is it and did you see me today?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
