And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
The police scanner is talking about you again....
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
