I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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